The Journey Begins

This is it.  The beginning.  Beginnings are always a mix of emotions because normally the beginning means something had to come to an end.  I’m here because one of those journeys came to an end.

I used to run an in home daycare.  At the end I had three wonderful families and five beautiful preschoolers and toddlers running around my house three days a week.  It’s funny because (what seems like eons ago) God set me on this daycare journey which I started but not without kicking and screaming first.   I always had career dreams that didn’t seem to have any daycare options in them – but that’s where God placed me for a season of my life.

But…as with anyone’s life journey – this wasn’t where God had me stay.  So…..here I am!  On another path God has lead me to – but not without some kicking and screaming first.  I literally have the prayer in my prayer journal – CROSSED OUT – because I was THAT sure that he didn’t want me to take a path into writing about my life, my faith, and my family.  I’m quite positive that’s when God sat back and laughed knowing full well that I would come around in time!!  LOL!!

A few years ago I struggled with a pretty serious bout of depression.  During this dark season of my life I was surrounded by some great prayer warriors that helped me see the light.  Even if it were just small glimpses of light that gave me hope.  That hope turned into THE MOST BEAUTIFUL relationship with God I could’ve ever imagined.  I spent SO MANY hours on my hands and knees, with my forehead on the floor, crying out for help. Sometimes there were no words –  where I know the Spirit picked up on my behalf.  I could feel it.  In the very depths of my soul.  That eventually I would be okay.  I would be bruised but I would be okay.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.  And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.  – Romans 8:26-27

It took a long time but eventually that next summer I was feeling better.  I just knew that God wanted more of me.  He wanted all of me.  And in order to give him that all, I needed to lay down the “things” that were distracting me.  And my husband – the beautiful creature of God that can only be described as kind, passionate, and SO PATIENT – came on board immediately.  Almost as if he knew I’d come along to thinking these things eventually and here I was!

We decided as a family our “stuff” was the biggest distraction for our family.  So we decided to say goodbye to our large, suburban home.  We’ve started our new life in a MUCH smaller home on 1 1/2 acres of woods.  In doing so we’ve had to say goodbye to enough stuff to fill a few apartments and are still in the process of donating!  Just today I took another load of pictures, scooters, and rollerblades to Goodwill.

This blog is the start of my new beginning in my new home with my family.  To be honest about the struggles of raising kids, being a wife, and loving God with every fiber of my being.  I hope you come along, read and enjoy.  And if not that’s okay too.  Because my 13 year old already wanted to make sure I had plans for what I was going to do six months from now if no one followed me!!

For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.  – Isaiah 41:13blog5

 

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